STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES

C’mon. I know you’ve heard of the saying “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Oh, but they do.

When I was a child, my mother would tell me to rehearse that saying over and over again to block out the hurtful things kids would say to ridicule me. From elementary school of high school, guys would always tease me because of my slanted eyes. I convinced myself they only did that because they secretly had a crush on me.

At first I let it go. But the more they did it, the more it hurt. I was young. I didn’t understand why they would make Asian references to me when they knew it embarrassed me. I mean, who would want to be the center of a joke, especially a bad one?

I eventually developed a thick skin, and my embarrassment turned into anger. In my freshman year of high school, I attend a Catholic school. I was only one of 11 Black students in the entire student body. It was really awkward. I was teased because of what I didn’t own. My mom didn’t drive a Range Rover like Liz’s mother. My dad didn’t own a successful upscale restaurant like Lauren’s father. I wasn’t extremely poor, but I damn sure wasn’t rich either. People would call me “Shaniqua” or yell “Here comes the Black girl from hell” as I walked down the hall. I couldn’t take it anymore. I withdrew after my freshman year.

Fast forward nine years. I’m a successful PR professional and blog about children’s issues that are related to health and safety. And I’ll occasionally throw in a tip or two on how that issue corresponds with the public relations industry.

Well, someone commented on my last post regarding Bristol Palin’s pregnancy and her mother’s bid for vice presidency using some very derogatory and racist language. I was taken aback. According to the comment, since I’m not of the majority race, I know nothing about PR and have no business giving advice on parenting. I didn’t know how to respond, so I deleted the comment and said nothing.

This is my first post since then.

I came to grips with myself. Luckily I’m an adult who understands that there will always be ignorance in the world. There are people who get pleasure out of hurting another person’s feelings. Had I been a little more naïve, I could have agreed with this person and said, “She’s right. I’m a n!&&er who knows better than to give my two cents on anything.” Had I been a little more naïve, I would’ve given in to the boys who taunted me as a child. But that’s not me. Not all children are this strong.

The bantering and teasing is sometimes enough to drive a person to harm herself or others. Look at the girl who committed suicide because of nasty things her “friends” said to her on MySpace. Child taunting is a serious issue, and if you do it, you have to take responsibility for the effect your words may have on another person’s life… or death.