THE TRUTH ABOUT CHRIS BROWN AND RIHANNA: AN ANALYSIS

The Good

I remember watching an awards show a few years ago (before they started dating) and seeing them present an award together. The chemistry was undeniable. I could feel it as if I was on stage with them. They traveled together. They performed together. It was young love and it was beautiful.

Rihanna’s 20/20 interview with Diane Sawyer:

The Bad

In her interview, Rihanna said they started as friends, best friends. That’s what made their relationship dangerous. She admitted, “It was a bit of an obsession.” There are other reports of verbal and slightly physical fights between them. She’s slapped and thrown shoes at him. He’s slammed car doors so hard that it broke the glass and pushed her against the wall. Their relationship took a turn down a forbidden road. There was no turning back. Their love was fatal.

The Ugly

Rihanna confirmed the details of the infamous fight as Sawyer read the police report. After seeing the report myself, I saw that some details were conveniently left out. Was it to put Rihanna in a brighter light? Some people say yes. Some are confused as to why Rihanna would interview nine months after the fight. They claim that the only reason why she’s talking now is that her album will be coming out in a few weeks. It’s only for publicity.

But that would be a shame, wouldn’t it? That she’d talk on national television about her parents’ abusive relationship, which could possibly damage her relationship with them. That she’d talk about the fight and only divulge all of the details, but just those that made her look innocent? (Certainly a few things left me confused. Like what happened between reading the text message and the fight. Or how she told Diane she will never be with him, yet she still has feelings for Chris and doesn’t know what the future will hold.)

Chris Brown’s MTV interview with Sway:

The Aftermath

No one knows what happened in that car except for Rihanna and Chris. And he’s not saying what happened. Obviously. He’s had three public interviews and in none did he explain the fight’s details. Was it truly to keep it between him and Rihanna, or was it not to make himself seem like a bigger monster?

Rihanna is only 21 years old. Chris is 20. This is something that both singers will have to deal with for the rest of their lives. Chris Brown – the abuser. Rihanna – a domestic violence victim. After watching both interviews, I was reminded how young they are. You look at celebrities and entertainers and see them for what they do and are known for instead of who they are after you take away the money, the spotlight and the fame.

Unfortunately, this will follow them no matter how much they try to forget it. Their careers will be affected, for better or for worse.

A PR Perspective

This is where I disagree with Chris’s publicist and manager. Their advice to Chris should’ve been based on many expectations and possibilities.  When Chris had his first interview, it was his chance to prove that he was truly sorry. It didn’t happen. He was poorly trained. When interviewing, especially on about a topic that has changed your life and career for the worse, proper media training is important. He was ill prepared, poorly dressed and said the wrong things. Viewers couldn’t relate to him. When he said that he was sorry, it wasn’t authentic. As was the case when he issued his “video apology” on YouTube in July. It was staged and emotionless. Chris seemed nervous in his interview with Larry King, was too informal in his radio interview with Angie Martinez (even referred to Rihanna as “Shorty”) and too relaxed in his interview with MTV’s Sway.

My advice to Chris would be to focus on his community service, his career, and bettering himself as a person and moving on from his. No more interviews. At this point, they would serve no purpose.

Rihanna’s publicist has been guiding her in hopes of recreating her tainted image. And she’s done a beautiful job. In the nine months that Rihanna was “silent,” she’s became a fashion icon, using the streets of New York as her runway. Hitting the studios in the wee hours of the morning recording for her upcoming album, Rated R. Putting her life and soul into her music. When she finally spoke (both to Glamour magazine and in her 20/20 interview), she said all she needed to say. No more interviews are needed. She answered each question asked. The questions that Chris dodged, she responded. After seeing how Chris was ridiculed during his many interviews, she knew what not to do. She was strong and looked beautiful on camera.

All both Chris and Rihanna can do is move on with their careers and give their fans something positive to talk about. They are living a life where millions of children and teens look up to them. Everything they do will be scrutinized because they are being watched. They are idols and role models.

But both are young and talented. Their career is in their hands. How they handle their lives from now on will determine how successful they will be.

PREVIEW: RIHANNA’S 20/20 (2), CHRIS BROWN’S MTV INTERVIEW

Here’s another sneak peek of Rihanna’s candid interview that will air tonight at 10 PM on ABC’s 20/20.

 

And here’s a preview of Chris Brown’s interview on MTV with Sway. You can view the interview in its entirety tonight at 6 PM.

PREVIEW: RIHANNA’S 20/20 INTERVIEW

Via www.people.com

After months of silence since the fight with ex-boyfriend Chris Brown, R&B sensation Rihanna decided to speak publicly about the ordeal so she can be a voice to help others who may be in danger of returning to abuse.

We have to remember that although she is a celebrity, she’s still human and very young. Check out a snippet of her interview on 20/20. The complete interview will air on Friday at 9 p.m.

I WENT TO SLEEP RIHANNA, WOKE UP BRITNEY SPEARS

My next few posts will be dedicated to the newly-declared fashion icon (and singer) Rihanna. Why? Because after eight months of silence, she’s finally speaking out about the famous “Chris Brown incident” and how it changed her life.

Some people say that the only reason why she’s finally talking about it is because her new album, “Rated R,” will be released on November 23. But regardless of the reason, I’m still anxious to hear what she has to say.

Glamour Magazine named Rihanna “Woman of the Year” and will honor her on Monday at New York’s Carnegie Hall. In the December issue, Rihanna discusses her music, upcoming CD (of course), domestic violence and the infamous assault case with Chris Brown.

But I did a little web searching and found the interview early. Check it out:

Let’s talk about this past year—you’ve obviously been through some difficult things. How did the people around you help you cope?

My friends and family have been extremely supportive, and everyone has been there for me. But at some point you are there alone. It’s a lonely place to be—no one can understand. That’s when you get close to God.

Are you referring to the [Chris Brown] incident?

I am talking about starting with the night [before] the Grammys and then on. That was not the only thing that occurred this year. The picture leaking…it was one thing after another.

You’re talking about the photo [reportedly of Rihanna’s injured face taken by police after Brown assaulted her] that was allegedly leaked by cops. You handled that so well; you kept silent in the press.

It was humiliating; that is not a photo you would show to anybody. I felt completely taken advantage of. I felt like people were making it into a fun topic on the Internet, and it’s my life. I was disappointed, especially when I found out the photo was [supposedly leaked by] two women.

How has this event changed you as a person, as a woman?

I’m stronger, wiser and more aware. You don’t realize how much your decisions affect people you don’t even know, like fans.

Do you think you’ve gotten your strength from your mom?

Definitely. My mom gave us the tools to survive…. My parents separated when I was eight or nine. I helped her raise my [youngest] brother, because my mom was working all the time. He’s my favorite.

Do you feel that this experience has laid the groundwork for coping with anything so public again?

It has taught me so much. I felt like I went to sleep as Rihanna and woke up as Britney Spears. That was the level of media chaos that happened the next day. It was like, What, there are helicopters circling my house? There are 100 people in my cul-de-sac? What do you mean, I can’t go back home?

If you could offer a message to the millions of young women who look up to you, what would you tell someone who found herself in a similar situation?

Domestic violence is a big secret. No kid goes around and lets people know their parents fight. Teenage girls can’t tell their parents that their boyfriend beat them up. You don’t dare let your neighbor know that you fight. It’s one of the things we [women] will hide, because it’s embarrassing. My story was broadcast all over the world for people to see, and they have followed every step of my recovery. The positive thing that has come out of my situation is that people can learn from that. I want to give as much insight as I can to young women, because I feel like I represent a voice that really isn’t heard. Now I can help speak for those women.

I think that’s a great message. What about your new album? What’s it like?

I was involved in a lot of the writing. I put everything I’ve wanted to say for the past eight months into my music. The songs are really personal. It’s rock ‘n’ roll, but it’s really hip-hop: If Lil’ Wayne and Kings of Leon like my album, then I’ll feel good. I would not change anything about it. Even if people don’t love it, I made exactly the piece of art that I wanted to make. It’s super fearless—which is exactly how I feel right now. I am in a really good place.

Justin Timberlake said it sounds a little more grown-up—do you agree with that comment?

I agree. I have grown up a lot since my last album. It [represents] exactly where I am at right now.

Jay-Z once said that your challenge as an artist was going to be to make people relate to you as a human being. What do you think he meant by that?

Before, there was an innocence to me. It was a perfect image. So the minute I did something imperfect, it was a big deal. I think that’s what he was referring to: People forget that after we get to our hotel rooms at night, we take a shower, we watch TV, eat room service and do normal things. Behind it all, we are still human beings.

Now let’s talk about your success in the world of fashion: You have become a fashion icon practically overnight. What does it mean to you as a performer, as a creative person, as a way to celebrate who you are?

Fashion for me is another way I get to express myself creatively. It is one of the fun things I get to do: to play dress-up, and create outfits and looks that aren’t typical. I am an artist, so I like creating things. Shoes are my favorite thing.

OK, so how many pairs do you own?

Too damn many! [Laughs.]

Your look has evolved from the beginning of your career.

In the first two years of my career, there were a lot of restraints on what I could do. I couldn’t wear certain colors of lipstick, like bright pink, dark pink or red; [my lips] had to be natural. Eventually, I stopped communicating with certain people at the label, and did exactly what I wanted to do. And that was to cut my hair, dye it black, change my clothes, change my sound. Really to just express myself.

Let’s talk about that famous hair of yours. Your cut now is even called “The Rihanna” in salons!

Yeah, we cut it into a bob for the [Good Girl Gone Bad album] cover shoot, but then I went even shorter for the NRJ Music Awards [in January 2008]. My hairdresser just said, “I don’t feel like doing your hair anymore—I want to cut it.” I was like, Finally!

On to your charity work: What in your own life inspired you to start the Believe Foundation?

I have always loved kids. They are little adults with so much personality, and it is fun to work with that. Whether that means donating school supplies or medication, or [using my celebrity] to get them a bone marrow transplant, I want to help.

You actually helped a young girl and a mother of two, both of whom were suffering from leukemia, find bone marrow matches for transplants. How did that happen?

My manager sent me a video this little girl did for her best friend. It shows them playing, and then Isabelle says to the camera, “This is my friend Jasmina, and here’s how you can help her: Swab your mouth for DNA, and put it into an envelope.” They were both adopted and have the best bond—they are inseparable. The video made you fall in love with both of them. I was like, I have to help her. So I did a bunch of events to raise awareness. Just when we thought we were not going to find a donor, we found one. The other woman, Lisa, is a mother of two who was diagnosed with leukemia and was going to die if she didn’t get a bone marrow transplant. I knew she could not leave her two kids; that’s all that was going through my head. So we said a lot of prayers, sent out press releases and did events in order to get the word out. Her transplant was successful. She was in a lot of pain, but she was so strong and determined.

Wow, that’s amazing. So here you are, only 21, and you have already accomplished so much. Where do you see yourself in five years?

So much has happened in the past five years, I can’t speak for the next five. What I want is to continue to grow. Because I am never satisfied; I always want more. I always want to get better. I always want to climb another step.

Is it too early for you to think, I want to be in love, I want to have a family? Is that too far down the road?

I hope I find love in the next 10 years—that will be pretty annoying if I am 31 and still have never been in love! But yeah, I’d like to be in a great place in both my personal life and my career. I still want to be doing what I love. Whatever that is in 10 years, I don’t know.

Well, congratulations on being a Woman of the Year!

It is an honor. The women who are being honored are all such great inspirations to me. I look up to them.

 

Did Glamour make a good decision choosing Rihanna as Woman of the Year? Or was someone else more deserving Please, share your thoughts.

TINKERBELL’S NEW LOOK

What happened to the form fitting, short-cut dress that Tinkerbell (Tinker Bell) used wear to show off her curvy body?

Apparently it was time for a change, even though she’s been rocking the same outfit since 1953. In her new movie, “Tinker Bell and the Lost Treasure,” not only is she no longer Peter Pan’s sidekick, but Tink is sporting a new look: a jacket, cool hat, leggings and tall boots.

Hmm, someone is definitely keeping up with today’s fashion. Everyone knows that leggings and tall boots are in style this season.

This has me wondering what Disney bombshell is next to undergo a change… Princess Jasmine? Ariel?

What do you think of the change? Was it necessary to change Tink’s look as she’s taking on a new role?

DISNEY AND THE FOOL

No need to beg your 14-year-old neighbor to babysit little Bobby when you have something that will entertain and teach your child. Introducing “Baby Einstein,” also known as the electronic babysitter.

For eight years, Disney has advertised its “Baby Einstein” DVDs as being a god send. And I believed them. I bought the discs and thought that after letting my daughter watch them, she’ll be just what the titled implied: a Baby Einstein.

Boy was I wrong. I’m not saying that Jaelah isn’t intelligent, but the “Baby Einstein” collection (including “Baby Mozart”, “Baby Shakesphere” and “Baby Galileo”) was not what it claimed to be.

According to the NY Times, Disney finally admitted that the DVDs products are not “educational,” very different from how they were first advertised. In fact, there is no scientic evidence to prove this is true. Oh, the horror. 

Even though the company claimed that the DVD would “combine visual and linguistic experiences that facilitate the development of the brain in infants ages one to 12 months,” this was not true. (via Newsweek)

And the trickery continues.

In fact, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommend that children under the age of 2 should not watch any television. Welp, there goes the electronic babysitter concept.

To avoid a class-action lawsuit, Disney is now offering full refunds to any DVD bought since 2004. (Click here for details and mail-in certificate.) Refunds must be requested by March 4, 2010.

How’s that for deceptive advertising?

(If you want more, check out the Atlantic Wire to read reactions of parents and industry experts.)

PIMPING YOUR KID

Jon and Kate. Octomom. Richard Heene. They all have one thing in common: Using their children to fulfill their desire to become a reality television star.

Stay with me.

The Gosselin family had a reality show on TLC for five seasons. We saw the family at the best and worst. We literally watched Jon and Kate’s relationship deteriorate in front of our eyes. As their eight children witnessed the arguing between their mother and father, so did we. The further Jon and Kate drifted apart, the more uncomfortable it was to watch. Sitting on opposite ends of the sofa. Awkward body language. Silent treatments. Put-downs. Affairs. Accusations. Divorce.

Nadya Suleman, best known as Octomom, received tons of media attention when she gave birth to octuplets in January. Apparently, Nadya wanted to create a reality show that followed her and her 14 kids around while she searched for love.

Hmm…

Richard Heene is the father of “Balloon Boy,” who recently caught the attention of millions when they thought that Heene’s six-year-old son, Falcon, was trapped in a homemade hot air balloon as it traveled around Colorado for hours. Once authorities landed the balloon and the boy was nowhere in sight (we later found out that it wasn’t possible for a human to travel in the hollow contraption), people searched everywhere for Falcon. Hours later, he emerged from his parents’ attic, where he was hiding in a box.

In an interview, Falcon exposed his parents’ plan by revealing that they “did this for the show.” In another interview, the boy vomited twice. Probably from exhaustion. Smooth parenting.

This is exploitation at its finest. These parents exploited (or at least tried) their children to gain publicity and earn a paycheck. But at what expense? Was it worth divorce, jail time and regret?

Who’s to blame? Is it the parents for putting their wants over their children’s needs and well-being? Or is it doing whatever it takes to live the American dream (becoming famous and having money)?

I wonder what the children will think of their parents once they’re old enough to understand what happened…

15 AND PREGNANT: A TRUE STORY

As I scoured the internet looking for a current event to discuss in my Generation Y GED class, I came across an interesting video report.

At a Chicago high school, 115 female students are either pregnant or already moms. Wow.

I asked my students (who range from 16 to 24 years old) to respond to this issue, giving advice on how the problem (yes, it is a problem) should be rectified. Here are a few responses:

I believe this number is so high because there is a lot of pressure in high school to have sex. Most of the students probably have never been taught to have protected sex or don’t know how important it is to do so. They see it on TV and think that it’s OK. It’s not.

Teen pregnancy has always been an issue that doesn’t seem to be taken seriously. There are so many reasons why teens think it’s OK to have sex or get pregnant. Some do it for attention or think they’re in love and will stay with their boy/girlfriend forever. Most practice unsafe sex because no one has made them fully aware of the consequences. But these students are still babies themselves and easily misled.

These girls don’t understand that it is not promised that the father will be there. He can leave at any time. Then she’s stuck trying to take care of a child when she can’t even take care of herself. I think there should be a class for sex education that explains all the diseases you can catch. They should bring in teen mothers to explain their day-to-day lives of raising a child. If more adults put effort in sharing how they feel and take abstinence and safe sex, maybe the percentage will decrease.

The reason why I think many high school girls are pregnant is because of their lack of knowledge… they don’t know what it’s like to have a baby. It seems like people don’t care about wearing condoms because they trust their partner’s word. (Don’t worry, I’m safe.) I’m from Chicago, so I know there’s more to the story. There’s a dance called “banging.” It’s just like having sex. You’ll dance with a girl and if you’re feeling each other, you take her home and have sex with her. I haven’t heard of this happening anywhere else but in the Windy City.

This is a very high percentage. It almost seems unreal. The students probably didn’t have a good role model in their lives, so they look for love in young men. They don’t understand that raising children is different from babysitting. They don’t realize how hard it is until it’s too late. Parents need to be tougher on their children. Teach them to wait until marriage to have sex. Teach them to use protection to protect them from pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. I hope that the mothers are able to be mature and responsible enough to raise their kids in a good home and loving environment, and provide the kids with what they need.

After doing a little more searching, I found another story on CNN. (You can view the video here.) Some agrue that seeing cool moms on television encourage girls to do the same thing. Others blame the school system and lack of parental guidance. Pointing fingers without taking responsibility is easy.

These girls are forced to fast forward through their teenage lives. Press play at motherhood. They will have to act like adults even though they are still in puberty.

What will become of their lives? More than likely, they will become dependent on the welfare system. I’m not saying that this will happen to all of them. I know many women who are not depending on government assistance, are college graduates and work full-time. But the odds are against the students of Robeson High School. Their quality of life will be hard to improve.

The school is trying to help by not kicking the students out, as did some of the parents of the students. The school is also converting a neighborhood crack house (I’m cringing right now) into a daycare so they students can still get an education. But what about prevention programs? These students need to be hit with reality. Being a parent is not easy. Nowadays, it seems like more and more people are using children to get a damn reality show. Is that what is encouraging them to be early parents? If so, the reality is pretty damn sad.

KANYE KILLS HIS EGO

Check out this dramatic, yet genius short film featuring Kanye West. In the film he is shown as an egotisical alcoholic who is is obsessed with his music and women. At the end of the film, he comes to his senses and does something that will change his life for the better. Is this a preview of the new, changed Kanye? Only time will tell.

 

We Were Once a Fairytale…

What do you think?

KILLING THE FUTURE, ONE CHILD AT A TIME

A few weeks ago, news spread the country about 16-year-old honor student Derrion Albert, who was brutally beaten to death on his way home from school. It took me a while to react to it, but I’m being the mother of a young son, this is something that worries me.

What Happened

A group of kids were fighting as Albert was past. He was swept into the fight, hit with wooden planks and kicked. He tried to get up but was knocked back down. The four teens (now charged with murder) kept hitting Albert until he didn’t move. It wasn’t until minutes later that someone grabbed him and dragged him into a building. It was too late.

According to the Chicago Tribune, Albert became the third Chicago teenager killed in September. At least seven more were shot.

The teens who were charged with Albert’s death were his classmates. As a watched the gruesome video (captured by a student on his cell phone), I couldn’t help but cry. Albert had a promising future ahead of him. Not any more.

The Chicago community lost five lives that day. Albert was killed and the culprits, if convicted, will spend years in jail. The odds of them living a promising life (after being released) are slim.

Something needs to change. Quick.

Statistics

• In the inner cities, more than half of all black men do not finish high school.
• In 2004, 21 percent of black men in their 20’s who did not attend college were in jail or prison.
• By their mid-30’s, 6 in 10 black men who had dropped out of school had spent time in prison. (source)

Make a Change

After hearing the Albert’s story, celebrities have been speaking out about the condition of the Black community, youth in particular.

Rapper Bow Wow proposed a call to action to young men and women who think that it’s cool to act out what they see on television or hear in songs. Although they need to be accountable for their actions (instead of placing the blame on someone else), media and entertainers must also understand the effect they have on the world.

Actor and rapper Nas, who has always been outspoken about the potential of Black youth, wrote an open letter to the “Young Warriors who are fighting the wrong wars.”

Nas writes:

Your fight should to be about becoming bigger and better. To have your own businesses. Real businesses Not Hustles. To have careers not jobs. Not selling mixtapes. You have the resources to do anything you want. There’s no excuses. We have no one to blame but ourselves. We have so much great work to do!!!

(Read the entire letter here.)

Bottom Line

Who said it was cool to murder and rob? When did it become OK to take someone’s life? Why has this become the norm?

Please, enlighten me.